


Fates Entwined- King Loki and Michelle

by starrynightfantasies



Series: In Clone Love and War [8]
Category: Loki laufeyson - Fandom
Genre: F/M, King Loki and Michelle, Origins, baby Loki, loki laufeyson - Freeform, young loki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-17
Packaged: 2020-10-05 07:07:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,890
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20484866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starrynightfantasies/pseuds/starrynightfantasies





	1. Chapter 1

**Prologue**

“That's enough. I've seen enough. Cut it,” Urd held out a shiny green thread and scowled at Skuld. “He has clearly strayed too far from our reach.”

“No. Have patience. We must watch to see what transpires. He may still be worth saving,” Verdandi pleaded, still desperately weaving a pattern and hoping it would influence the god who had seemingly lost his way.

“Don't you think he's created enough chaos on Midgard? He is clearly unhinged. Nothing can bring him back n--”

“Wait... Is he... _ Helping her? _ ” 

The disbelief in Urd’s voice made Verdandi and Skuld look down to examine the chaotic scene more closely.

“Yes, but look who it is. Of course he's going to save  _ her _ .”

“He doesn't remember her though. He can't. He has no idea that--that he used to be in love with her. You see? He's worth saving. Thor was right. Loki is still in there somewhere.”

Both of the other Three Norns stared at Verdandi as if she was nothing more than a hopeful child.

In the midst of all the madness, Loki found himself staring into the eyes of a mortal woman he felt compelled to save. The expression on her face was not one of fear, but of awe and something else he couldn’t quite place. Compassion? Empathy? Lifting her into his arms, he ran to the nearest relatively safe place before reappearing into the fray. But for some reason, he couldn’t seem to shake her face from his mind. 

“I  _ told _ you. He has no clue who she is! Look at him. He’s starting to waver,” Verdandi whispered, still determined to save the youngest prince.

“You may be right, but what of  _ her _ ? Obviously, there is some remnant of him left in her mind somewhere. And  _ you're _ the one who wove them together.  _ You're _ the one who was supposed to make them forget. Did you do your job properly?” Urd asked with more than a hint of trepidation in her voice.

  
  


As the Norns looked upon her, Michelle sat shivering in the corner of an abandoned building while the fight continued outside. She wondered why that man-  _ Loki _ \- they called him, would save  _ her _ . If it was his true intention to take over the planet, then why did he choose to show her mercy when he could have easily killed her? She shook her head, already knowing the answer. He simply wasn’t a killer. She found herself wondering who he was and what had prompted him to do something so drastic. Surely, anyone who would stop to save  _ one person _ was worth saving, themselves. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Part One**

It was always the same. Kissing. Touching. And then the strong grasp on her arm, pushing her hand lower; lower than she was prepared to venture. Hot needy breath on her neck made her feel as if she were suffocating, and no matter how hard she tried to fight her own instincts, she shoved him away. The irritated huff that came from this one was almost exactly the same as the last. 

“Stop. I'm-- not ready for that yet,” she whispered into the darkness, already knowing what would happen next and in the days that followed.

_ Well I heard she's not really untouched. She had a lover once before!  _

_ I heard she's just holding out for Fandral. _

_ I heard she wouldn’t even  _ kiss _ Thor. Who doesn’t kiss  _ Thor?! _ I’d do  _ anything _ with him. _

The truth was, it didn't matter how many times Meschella went out with someone, she still didn't feel ready to take that next step. Things were not the same as they had been when her mother and father had courted, and she'd been raised to believe in waiting. For what, she didn't know. 

Although she could think of a  _ who _ that she might be waiting for, but she didn't think he would ever even notice her. He was so quiet and intelligent. She wondered whether he was even interested in dating. 

Sometimes she imagined tangling her hands in his black hair as he kissed her. She wondered if he would even need to push her hands lower or if they would wander _ there _ of their own volition. 

It seemed her latest date would be the last one for a while. At least that's what she suspected, judging from the thoughts and feelings swirling around whenever she passed by a large crowd of people. Her  _ gift _ didn't seem to be such a nice thing to possess anymore. It was even worse when she was in the presence of a group of men. Their feelings toward her were so  _ vicious _ . Sometimes, Meschella would catch a glimpse of Loki among the males and she couldn’t bear the thought of him having the same feelings toward her. She hoped he didn’t pay any mind to their banter. 

Loki’s feelings weren’t easy to read. His thoughts were jumbled every time she was close enough to feel his presence, and Meschella wondered if he knew how the others spoke about him. 

She'd heard whispers. The other warriors would talk of how they thought Loki wasn't useful in battle because he didn't wield a heavy weapon or because he used magic instead of brute force. They talked about how he spent so much of his time reading instead of drinking and laying with whores at the brothel. They called him names. He seemed to ignore it, but she wondered how much it really bothered him. After all,  _ she _ ignored the rumors about herself even though it brought her to tears almost every night.

Meschella hadn't wanted to go out with Thor, but when the oldest prince of Asgard asked for a date, a maiden did not turn it down lest she be judged very harshly and shunned by her family. Meschella’s family couldn’t  _ shun _ her- they had been gone for a long time- but she felt she owed it to them to try to make a good life for herself. After all, they were the reason she was living at the palace instead of somewhere much less appealing. However, after that particular date, it was a long time before she had another. It seemed even Loki was angry with her after the way she’d behaved with his brother, but seeing as how he didn’t really speak to her very often, she wasn’t quite certain. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Loki couldn’t _believe_ Thor had actually tried to court Meschella after he’d dropped so many hints that she was the one _he_ was interested in. _The brute_. He could hardly look in her direction knowing that his brother had told everyone in Asgard all the details of their non-encounter-- _and_ how he’d felt about it. Loki felt responsible somehow, but he didn’t know why. All of Thor’s friends _expected_ _things_ when they dated a lady. Loki suspected it was because of their status in the kingdom as warriors, but he couldn’t imagine being that way himself. He simply wanted to find someone he could talk to; someone who didn’t spend most of their time mocking him or treating him like a pariah. 

As he sat in the library late into the night, he became more and more irritated by his older brother’s actions. He knew he couldn’t stop Thor from telling everyone what had happened between him and Meschella, but he didn’t particularly care. He just wanted some kind of justice. Meschella deserved better than to be treated as a tease for  _ not _ wanting to just lay with anyone who tried to run their filthy hands up her dress. 

Stalking down the corridor, Loki stopped in front of his brother’s chambers and banged on the outer door.

“ _ Thor.  _ Open up. I wish to have a  _ word _ .”

All he could hear was giggling inside, but he was too angry to care. Flicking his wrist, he popped the door lock and walked inside, averting his eyes as a naked woman he’d never seen flailed for her clothing. 

“What the  _ Hel _ , Loki?” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Meschella noticed that the mood around the palace had shifted, but she couldn’t quite place what had transpired- not until she overheard some of the other women gossiping. 

_ Did you see Thor’s eye? I can’t believe Loki did that! All because he was angry over a woman.  _

_ What woman?! _

_ Well  _ I _ heard it was--- _

Meschella almost tripped when she heard her  _ own name _ .  _ Why would Loki fight Thor over  _ her?

A few hours later, she spotted Thor in the palace garden. She turned to walk away, but he ran up to catch her. 

“My lady, I wish to apologize to you for-- well, for how the others have been talking. It seems I needed my brother to remind me that I was not being a gentleman,” he chuckled awkwardly. 

Meschella’s face flushed with Thor’s mention of Loki, and it was obvious that he noticed immediately. 

“I’ve never seen him react so...explosively...to the chatter around the palace before. Have you two been talking?”

She knew that Thor was aware of the people that Loki socialized with, and she was not one of them. She suddenly wondered why he was so interested in her nonexistent relationship with his brother. 

“No...I don’t think he cares much for me, especially after, well you know.” 

Thor laughed and the sound echoed around them. With a shake of his head, he started to walk away. 

“He doesn’t  _ not _ like you. Otherwise, I wouldn’t have this shiner.”

Meschella blushed and looked down at her feet. She didn’t know what to say. Surely Thor meant Loki was simply irritated by the constant chatter? Perhaps the gossip had interrupted his preferred quiet life? 

It wasn’t long after that she saw Loki again. He was sitting alone at a table in the common area. The dark expression on his face told her that he probably wasn’t in any mood to talk, but she took a deep breath and walked over anyway. 

As she approached, dark eyes met hers though his head didn’t stray from its lowered position. 

“My prince-- I wanted to apologize…” 

Meschella barely spoke before he cut her off. 

“ _ Loki _ . For what?” He snapped. “Every other maiden in Asgard has taken a turn at my oaf brother. You may as well too. At least you didn’t sleep with him. Or so he says.” 

Shock and embarrassment coursed through Meschella as Loki sat smirking at her. It felt as if he’d slapped her and she suddenly wanted to look around to see if anyone had heard their exchange. A quick glance told her that his words had been just as quiet as always, but they had cut her to her core. 

Hot tears pricked her eyes and she turned to walk away making sure to be as dignified as possible, leaving the room without making a scene before running through the corridors to her chambers. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Loki watched Meschella leave and he silently shook his head, instantly hating himself. If he’d been truthful, he was still angry with Thor- not her. It wasn’t her fault. It wasn’t her fault she felt uncomfortable calling him by his  _ name _ . He’d wanted her to call him  _ Loki _ , not  _ my prince _ .  _ Why couldn’t he be better than this? _

With a deep breath, Loki stood and followed her. The very least he could do was apologize for being so brash. 

As he approached her chambers, Loki’s stomach dropped. Meschella was standing outside her door flanked by several of the other women who’d been talking about her earlier in the week, and they appeared to be harassing her. 

Loki felt his entire body heat up with anger. How  _ dare _ they. 

“What’s  _ this _ ?” Loki asked, glaring at the women who had drawn closer to Meschella, blocking her way to her own bedroom. 

Meschella’s face was pink and blotchy, and Loki could see that she’d been crying. His heart seized up in his chest. This was his fault. 

He waved his hand in a flicking motion as if sending an annoying insect away. 

“Off with the lot of you! You should be  _ ashamed _ of yourselves.  _ Pathetic _ .” 

As the other women scurried away, some shooting Loki fearful glares, he held out his hands to Meschella in a pleading gesture. 

“Please-- forgive me. I must admit I was still angry with my brother for the way he behaved with you,” he looked at the floor nervously, “and I was jealous.” 

Meschella frowned, tears still pouring down her cheeks. 

“ _ Jealous? _ Of what? I never wanted  _ any _ of this. I didn’t  _ want _ to go out with Thor. I certainly didn’t want to- to-  _ lay _ with him! And now, it seems everyone in the realm is angry with me because I  _ didn’t _ . What could you  _ possibly _ be jealous of,  _ Loki? _ ” 

She spat his name, but she noticed the corners of his mouth turning up as if he enjoyed it. He stepped forward slightly, and she tried to step away, but her back was pressed against the door. 

“I was jealous because  _ I _ wanted to court you. And my oaf brother  _ knew _ it. And the thought of him trying to put his hands all over you…” he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. 

“Will you just-- say my name once more? And then I promise I’ll leave. And I’ll see to it that the others leave you alone as well.” 

It was a moment before Meschella realized what Loki had said. 

“But… you’ve never even spoken to me,” she whispered. 

“I wanted to,” he breathed. 

“You gave Thor a black eye. Because of  _ me _ ?” Meschella asked incredulously.

Loki nodded, grinning proudly. 

“Why did you go out with him if you didn’t want to?” 

Meschella sighed. 

“My parents. They made me,” she looked down, but Loki could see her face flush. “Everyone knows you don’t turn down a date with a prince even if you aren’t particularly interested in that one.”

Meschella smiled, and Loki’s heart leapt into his throat. 

“That one? A-are you saying you’re interested in...the  _ other _ one?” 

Meschella nodded, and Loki stepped closer, taking her hand in his. 

“Would you like to have dinner with me? Tonight?”


	2. Chapter 2

**Part Two~ The Date**

As Meschella nervously readied herself for her date with Loki, she tried her best to tamp down her fear that he was playing a prank on her. When he had taken her hand, she'd felt nothing but sincerity, but she couldn't help herself. 

Glancing in her wardrobe, she found one of her favorite dresses. She wished she had something in Loki's color, but she thought it might be too early for such a declaration anyway. Just as she was finishing her bath and slipping into her underclothing, she heard a timid knock at her door.

“Yes? Just a moment, please,” she called.

There was no answer, so as soon as she was decent, Meschella opened the door. No one was there, but at her feet was a large black fancy box tied with a green velvet bow. Meschella gasped quietly and picked it up, carefully taking the box inside.

Her heart hammered in her chest as she pulled on the ends of the ribbon, untying the bow and opening the box. 

Inside was a dark green satin dress that appeared to be the perfect size for her. She gasped quietly when she realized that the gift  _ must _ have come from Loki himself. Then she smiled when she saw that he'd even included matching shoes and jewelry. 

_ Was he asking her to wear his colors? Officially? _

A maiden wearing one of the prince’s colors was quite significant. In fact, none of the women who had dated Thor  _ dared _ to wear red lest they appear to assume their relationship with him had progressed further than it had in reality. 

But this, Meschella thought, was something different. She smiled to herself as she began to slip into the dress, and a small piece of paper fell to the floor. When she picked it up, she saw that it had a short message written in extremely neat handwriting. 

_ Dearest Meschella, _

_ I think you would look absolutely stunning in this color. I would be honored if you would wear it tonight- and whenever you so choose. _

_ I am looking forward to our dinner very much.  _

_ Yours,  _

_ -Loki _

_ Whenever you so choose? _ Meschella’s fingers trembled as she read the note a few more times. She  _ thought _ that meant he wanted her to wear green.  _ Officially _ . For  _ him _ . 

Her eyes lingered on the word  _ “yours” _ for a few more seconds while her heart pounded madly in her chest. She’d never felt this excited for any of her other dates. After all, she had admired Loki from afar for decades; possibly even centuries. 

Slipping her feet into the perfectly sized shoes Loki had sent, Meschella stood in front of her mirror and sighed. He was right. She  _ did _ look good. Never in her wildest imaginations did she think she would wear something so rich, so delicately beautiful. 

She nearly jumped out of her skin when she heard another knock at her door. This time, it was Loki. 

“Norns, I was right. You are absolutely breathtaking,” he whispered. 

Meschella could hardly speak. He looked so handsome in his black trousers and emerald tunic.

“I--- thank you so much, Loki. This was such a lovely surprise,” she smiled. 

Loki fidgeted nervously, worrying his hands as she'd seen him do many times before.

“I hope I wasn't too presumptuous. You certainly don't  _ have _ to wear green, but I've wanted to see you in it for a very long time.”

Meschella shook her head and felt her cheeks grow hot.

“You weren't. I love this color,” she muttered, hoping her comment wasn't too subtle.

“I never cared much for red.”

Loki chuckled and took her hand, grinning mischievously.

“I wanted us to have some separation from all of Asgard’s prying eyes, so I asked to have dinner brought to us on my private balcony. I promise I have no ill intent, darling. I simply wanted you to have a pleasant evening without all the drama for once,” Loki explained, rambling somewhat anxiously as they walked together.

Meschella couldn't have been more thrilled. She had known that going to dinner with Loki so soon after her highly  _ publicized _ date with Thor would cause a stir around the palace but she didn't care. 

As Loki led Meschella through his chambers toward his private balcony, she blushed as she looked around his bedroom. She tried to stop herself from imagining what it would feel like to be naked on his silky sheets with him beside her  _ or inside her _ , but the thoughts came uninvited. 

“We could go for an evening ride later if you like?” Loki asked, startling her from her lewd thoughts and confusing her all at once.

“I thought you said you didn't have any ill intent,” she replied, smirking slightly as she realized he was talking about horseback riding.

Loki's answering blushing grin was absolutely worth the slightly guilty feeling she had from making such an obvious innuendo. 

“Well, I don't... Unless you do, love,” he winked, turning her knees to jelly. 

The sun was just beginning to set as they sat down to eat, and Loki reached across the table to squeeze Meschella’s hand. 

“I’m really happy to have you here with me tonight, Meschella. I must admit I’ve wanted to ask you to dinner for a long time.” 

Meschella smiled and looked down at their entwined hands. 

“I didn’t think you had even noticed me. I suppose I always wished you would, but then one of the others would ask me out and I felt I had to go, even if my heart wasn’t in it.” 

Dinner was lovely, and Loki and Meschella spent most of their time discussing books they liked. Eventually, Loki led Meschella back inside to show her yet another place he liked to spend his time. It was a smaller window with a storage seat, just big enough for two. Inside the seat, Loki had a small telescope and several books about the stars. Meschella’s wide-eyed excitement thrilled Loki, and they spent the next few hours sharing the seat and peering at the night sky. 

When it was time to say goodnight, Loki walked her to her chambers. Taking her hand, he pulled it to his lips and softly kissed her palm. When he heard her breath catch in her throat, he couldn’t help himself. He slid his hands around her waist, pulling her closer to him and kissed her with all the desire that had built up inside him over the last few hundred years. 


	3. Part Three- The Separation

Loki didn’t feel the slightest remorse for stealing the Casket from Odin’s vault. Seeing as how he was not even Odin’s real son, but one of the creatures who was so eager to rob the All-Father just hours before, Loki felt he was simply fulfilling his own destiny. Staring at his reflection in the mirror above his dressing table, Loki wondered if his love, his Meschella, would even allow him near her if she knew what he was. He wondered if she could bear the sight of him, knowing that he was not Aesir at all. In fact, he was one of the very same monsters who’d wrecked her home and killed her parents. She'd spoken of them many times before they had decided to marry. And when he'd asked for her hand, he told her he would like to finally meet her family- only to watch her dissolve into tears. 

She could  _ never _ find out what he was. 

It was likely she would think he had known all along. 

Setting the Casket aside, Loki sat on the edge of his bed and started to make a plan. If he wanted to stay in Asgard; to marry Meschella, he would have to prove he was worthy. 

He started thinking about all the reasons his plan  _ had _ to work. He thought of his and Meschella’s first date together; how she’d touched his hands and felt his nervousness. It was as if she knew him all the way to the depths of his soul. 

He remembered how much he’d wanted her, but also how he’d been so careful not to rush her. And how he’d felt when her tiny soft hand slipped down the front of his trousers for the first time. He’d been so afraid his lovemaking wouldn’t be enough, but it was as if they were made for each other. 

Tears began to drip down Loki’s cheeks as he realized how much he would lose if his plan didn’t succeed. What would he say to her if she found out what he truly was? How could he ever explain? He wasn’t sure he could face her at the moment without her noticing his distress, so he tried to avoid her at all costs.

Meschella had spent the last few days alone, wandering about the palace trying not to get too anxious about Loki's sudden absence. She knew he had duties especially after Thor had been banished, but he had never failed to find some small amount of time to spend with her even when things were rough. This time, his strange behavior along with his extended absence had her wondering whether he'd changed his mind about marrying her.

Tears threatened to spill down her cheeks as she examined everything that had happened between them in the last few weeks. She combed over every word she'd spoken, every move made, but she couldn't remember anything that might have caused him to leave her.

Perhaps he'd finally realized that she was no more than a simple villager. After all, the only reason she'd been given a space in the palace was because Odin had felt an obligation to make sure she was properly cared for. After her family had been attacked by the Frost Giants, Odin's guards had found her hiding in the forest; dirty, half-frozen, and terrified. Meschella knew that the All-Father wasn't  _ that  _ compassionate. He was trying to make sure no one else found out that such a violent attack had happened right under his nose. It was left unsaid, but Meschella always knew that part of the deal was keeping her mouth shut. 

Maybe Loki had finally realized she wasn't good enough for him. 

Loki had never felt so terrified. He'd finally realized what he had to do to keep his true identity a secret. He would destroy Jotunheim along with that entire race of bloodthirsty monsters. Perhaps then, even if Meschella  _ did _ find out he was one of them, she could see that he  _ wasn't  _ like them. Perhaps she would see what he was willing to do for her. And maybe even Odin would see him as a worthy son. Even if he didn't, at least maybe he would still have his love. Maybe she would see how much he loved her if he risked everything; his home in Asgard, his adoptive family, his very  _ life _ , to show her that he wasn't like the monsters who had hurt her before. 

A few days after Loki made himself scarce, Meschella heard he’d been made King of Asgard. It was a confusing time for everyone, especially given the fact that Thor’s coronation had been interrupted not long before. Meschella decided it was time to confront Loki. She’d spent too much time wondering and far too much time crying. Maybe he was just too overwhelmed with his new title and too proud to ask for her help. 

As she approached the throne room, she paused for a moment; her heart thudding wildly in her chest. She hadn’t been inside since she was a small child, and the memories were almost too much for her to bear. She could see the shadow of Loki’s helmet against the far wall of the chamber, and although the sight gave her comfort, she was still afraid of how he would receive her. 

“My king? May I...approach?” She whispered, her voice bouncing around the barren room. 

“Meschella--” Loki breathed, standing from his position on the throne and holding his arms out. She could see his discomfort clearly written on his face, and she could  _ feel _ how anxious he was that she was there. 

“I heard about your father, and I wanted to offer… comfort,” she bowed her head.

Loki stepped closer to her, knowing he shouldn’t. He knew she could feel his emotions, but he  _ needed _ her. He could  _ smell _ her from across the room, and all he wanted was to bury his face in her hair. To kiss her forehead and know that everything was alright. He reached out his hand, but looked down and remembered what it had looked like when he’d been holding the Casket and pulled it back just as quickly. 

“I never wanted this,” he muttered, gesturing toward the throne. 

“I know.”

Furrowing his brow, he silently begged Meschella to  _ please understand _ . He wanted to explain so badly, but he just  _ couldn’t _ . 

“I should go,” Meschella whispered, not knowing what to say. She started toward the door, but couldn’t leave. Turning around for a moment, she looked longingly at her love. 

“I love you, Loki. Please don’t forget that.”

That night, Loki sat on his private balcony as he’d done so many times before, but this time he was perched on the ledge. From there, he could see his dearest Meschella sitting in her chambers. His heart ached as he watched her feeble attempts to read one of their favorite books while dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. He closed his eyes for a moment, wishing he could be with her, but knowing it was best if he stayed away.  _ Soon, my love. Soon I will make this right. Please don’t give up on me. _

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

His plan had failed. 

Loki felt nothing as he let his fingers slip. He could see Thor’s mouth moving; see the expression on his face, but it made no sense. Was it horror? Anger? Loki didn’t know. All he knew was that he was free. But only for a moment. As he fell, his body turned to face the black void of space, and he could see her face; his Meschella. Soon, even though he’d done everything he could, she would know. She would  _ despise _ him, and though his body felt the fierce cold of the void enveloping it, his heart still hurt  _ so much worse _ . 

If only he’d had the chance to say goodbye. 

  
  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Norns watched as the youngest prince plummeted from the Bifrost, seemingly to his demise, and though the other two remained calm, Verdandi was quite beside herself. 

“ _ Urd, you  _ can’t _ let him die! He’s a  _ god.  _ Fix this! Now! _ ” 

Urd held up her golden shears as if to cut the prince’s lifeline, and both Skuld and Verdandi protested. 

“Stop this!”

Looking at the scene below them, Urd shook her head. 

“What exactly would you like me to do? He tried to kill an  _ entire race _ just to prove his love for this maiden. And now that he has failed, he  _ wants _ to die. Skuld, do you really think these two people should be together?” 

Skuld frowned and slowly shook her head. 

“Verdandi, you wove them together. Can you...separate them? Make them forget each other? I think it’s the only way. Otherwise...look what he’s capable of.”

Verdandi thought for a moment. She didn’t want to separate Loki and Meschella. Loki loved her so much, he was willing to strip his own heritage from existence to prove his love for her. He was willing to sacrifice  _ so much _ . He had been willing to leave Asgard- the only home he’d ever known- just to be with her. It was heart-wrenching. But it was Verdandi’s job to make sure something like  _ this _ did not happen. 

“I think I can,” she whispered. “But only if you can save him.” 

Urd set her shears down. 

“It’s done. He’s on his own path now.” 

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

When someone dies, people tend to leave everything as it was before; their chambers stays the same, their clothing remains untouched, and their belongings become somewhat of a shrine to them. Meschella had spent the last week locked inside her own personal shrine to Loki, wrapped tightly in one of his old capes and clutching the only thing she had left of him- his helmet. 

She sobbed until her face was swollen and her eyes barely opened, and she hadn't eaten or slept since the night he had plummeted off of the bridge. All she could think about was how things might have gone differently.

Why had Loki and Thor been fighting that night? Why in the Nine did Thor decide to  _ destroy _ the bridge? Had he realized Loki would fall?

Those were the questions burning her mind while everyone else in Asgard spent the evening  _ celebrating _ Thor’s  _ glorious _ return. Frigga tried to pull Meschella out of her chambers; to get her to come out for a bit and at least eat something, but she couldn't bear it. Loki was gone and she felt as if she was too. 

It wasn't long before things returned to normal around the palace, which made everything worse for Meschella. She'd felt closer to Loki when everything was chaotic and nothing felt right. It was then that she decided to sneak out of her own room to visit his. She just needed to sit on his balcony, look at the stars, lay in his bed. But when she let herself inside, all she felt was turmoil. It was as if Loki's emotions had lingered inside his room and they were twisting her mind and tearing at her heart. She couldn't stay. She ran out, bursting through his door without checking to see if anyone was in the corridor. 

“Meschella! Wait!” Thor's voice boomed behind her and she almost wanted to keep running.

Tears poured down her face as she turned to look at him.

“What?! What have you to say to me?”

All of her anguish and bitterness had built up, and now she had no energy left to hold it all inside.

Thor eyed her with trepidation.

“Are you alright? I mean- I haven't spoken to you or seen you since-”

“Since you let Loki fall from the bridge? No, I'm  _ not alright,” _ she said, taking a step closer to him even though his head fell in obvious shame.

“I want to know what happened. I want to know why you were fighting with your own brother that night; why you  _ let him die _ and why no one in Asgard  _ seems to care! _ ” 

Meschella began to pace around in front of Thor, not knowing how to stand still when so much grief was pouring out of her at once.

“I mean, I know how  _ wonderful _ it was to have you back from your vacation on Midgard, but don't you think the All-Father could have waited a  _ few days? _ ”

Sobs wracked Meschella’s body as she continued, and Thor gently took her shoulders even as she tried to pull away from him.

“Listen to me, Meschella,” Thor whispered, “I tried to save him. I-- I tried to pull him up, but he-- he let go.” 

Meschella looked up at Thor, confusion showing through her sorrow. 

“What do you mean, he  _ let go _ ?” 

Thor sighed, not wanting to tell her what had really happened. 

“He didn’t want to be saved, Meschella. He--”

Meschella suddenly understood the feeling she’d had inside Loki’s chambers; the fear and the turmoil and the absolute  _ hatred _ . What had made her Loki feel such pain? 

“But if the Bifrost hadn’t been broken, he wouldn’t have fallen in the first place,” she whispered. “What happened?” Her voice broke on the last word. Her throat hurt so much she could barely speak anymore. 

Thor’s shoulders slumped. 

“I had to do it, Meschella. Loki had this idea. He thought,” he paused; trying to find the words, “he thought he needed to destroy Jotunheim. He opened the Bifrost. He was going to use it. I’m sorry. I did what needed to be done. It was the only way to stop it.” 

Meschella didn’t respond. She merely stood, thinking about Thor’s confession. Loki thought Jotunheim needed to be destroyed. He’d never mentioned destroying the Frost Giants before, but just days after they infiltrated Asgard and just weeks after she’d told him the truth about her family, he had made a plan, and it had failed. He’d let go because he failed- because he felt such a responsibility to her. This was  _ her fault. _

“I must go,” she whispered, wiggling out of Thor’s grasp. She couldn’t bear speaking another word. 

  
  


Meschella didn’t remember walking to her chambers, and she didn’t remember walking out onto the destroyed bridge, but as she stood on the edge draped in Loki’s cape, she imagined she could still feel his presence. The swirls of light in the night sky reminded her of his magic, and the bright green splashes of color she could see in the distance made her think of his eyes. She couldn’t live without him. It was her fault he was gone, and she knew she would never recover. 

Holding onto his cape and spreading her arms out wide, she lifted her eyes to the sky. 

“Loki, my love, I’m coming to you. I know you’re out there. I can still feel you,” she whispered as she let herself fall forward, diving off of the Bifrost into the void below. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Skuld turned to Verdandi, who was looking quite guilty. 

“I thought you said you would make them forget.” 

Quietly, Verdandi lifted a thick piece of woven material made of two vibrant colors. 

“Can you see how tightly these strands are woven together? Is there any light showing through this fabric?”

Skuld examined the material and shook her head. 

Verdandi nodded and continued. 

“When two people are woven together as tightly as Loki and Meschella, there  _ is no separating them. _ Even death cannot break that bond, Skuld. Time and space mean nothing. Death means nothing. Even  _ we _ mean nothing after that bond is made. So no, I can’t make them forget. Now, are you going to save her? Clearly, she loves him and she doesn’t deserve to die because  _ someone _ lied to the prince so long ago.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

New York- 2012

As Loki tried in vain to think of ways to stop the Chitauri without arousing suspicions, his mind was filled with the image of that mortal woman’s face. Her expression of understanding; her willingness to trust him even after all she’d witnessed; it was not something he’d expected. Every cell in his body wanted to turn around and go back to her- to be absolutely certain she was alright- but he knew that if he did, he was as good as dead. 

Perhaps he would see her again one day...

  
  



	5. Chapter 5

Midgard- 2019

King Loki had been searching for resources to help him gain his own magical abilities for months. Every one of his brothers had  _ something _ ; healing, teleportation, shape-shifting, the ability to  _ hear _ animals- but he hadn't even been able to produce a spark. Not one damn green light. Not even one of those pretty little butterflies his brother, the soon-to-be-father, was so good at conjuring. 

As he sat in the floor of the local library for the third night that week, he noticed a woman walking around browsing the stacks. She was striking. So enchanting she actually managed to draw his attention away from the pile of books he had been pouring over for the last two hours. 

He watched her covertly, discreetly glancing over the top of his book until she came closer. He drank in her feminine curves and sweet citrus scent before grinning up at her as if he'd just noticed her standing there.

To his surprise, she greeted him first.

“Looks like you've found a few good ones,” she nodded to his pile of books.

Suddenly very insecure about his choice of reading material, he leaned over, covering one of the more hokey sounding titles;  _ “Magic for Dummies.” _

Eyeing the armload she was carrying, he chuckled.

“I don't think I'm doing quite as well as you are, darling.”

The beautiful pink blush that spread across her cheeks made Loki's head spin even as he sat on the floor. 

Without warning, her books toppled out of her arms, and she let out a tiny squeal of surprise. 

“Oh! I’m  _ so _ sorry! I’m so clumsy!”

As she bent over to pick them up, more of her lovely scent wafted toward him, and Loki was thankful he wasn’t relying on his legs to hold him upright. 

“Nonsense, love. You’re just trying to carry far too many at once. Allow me,” he said, grinning. 

“What’s your name, darling?”

The mischievous grin never left his face as he held out his hand. Michelle was surprised when he brought it to his lips, kissing it softly instead of shaking it. 

“Michelle,” she whispered. 

“Very pretty. I’m Loki. It’s lovely to meet you. I can’t believe I’ve never seen you here before.” 

_ Loki _ . 

Michelle knew that name. When Loki noticed her expression, he furrowed his brow and let her hand go. 

“You recognize me, don’t you?” 

His face fell, and she could feel his melancholy envelope them. 

“I  _ think _ so, but… oh.  _ Oh _ .” 

Loki could see that she’d put the pieces together. He wasn’t sure if she would believe that he wasn’t  _ that _ Loki, but he really wanted to try. 

“You know, I always felt that it wasn’t all your fault,” she whispered. 

Loki stared at her, almost unable to speak. 

“I-- I mean, you  _ must _ have had a good reason. And if you’d really wanted to- to-  _ kill _ everyone, you could have done.” 

Perhaps she  _ would _ believe him. She seemed quite open-minded. 

“What if I told you that I’m not the same Loki? I mean, I  _ look _ exactly like him and we share DNA, but I wasn’t there in New York that day.” 

Michelle looked around, making sure no one was listening. 

“Will you tell me more? Could we go somewhere a bit less quiet?”

Loki couldn’t believe his good fortune. This beautiful woman  _ didn’t _ believe he was a psychopath, and she had asked  _ him _ to go somewhere else to talk. He wondered what kind of trick the Norns were playing on him.

  
  
  


“Do you like coffee?” 

Michelle asked as Loki carried an armload of books out of the library. 

“Only if it’s very sweet and creamy,” he purred almost obscenely. 

Michelle blushed, biting her lip. The images his words conjured up in her mind were not what she’d originally intended when she’d offered him a simple cup of coffee, but as he strutted along beside her, she decided she liked them. 

“Well, there’s a great coffee shop just up here on the corner. Would you like to join me? They have plenty of sweet and creamy varieties.” 

  
  


“I can make a divine cup of coffee, you know,” Loki said with a wink.

“Oh yeah?” 

Michelle smiled, knowing she would eventually have to tell him that she  _ owned _ the shop where they were going, but not wanting to intimidate him right away.

“Oh yes,” he grinned, “but you'd have to come to my place…”

Dear God that was tempting.

The coffee shop was lovely, and Loki found himself feeling very much at home there. As he looked around, he could feel Michelle's eyes on him and he wondered if she was seeking his approval. It suddenly occurred to him that perhaps she might be trying to impress him. The thought made him smile.

“This place is amazing! I adore the artwork and the ambiance. It's just dark enough to feel private but the lamps and candle light make it welcoming,” he whispered, bending down closer to her ear so as not to disturb the other patrons.

Michelle smiled happily, trying her very best to keep her secret from for him as long as she could. She very rarely got an honest opinion from anyone when they knew she owned the place, so having him say those things was a relief. 

“You really like it?”

His face was inches from her own and she could catch the faint scent of leather and some other intoxicatingly manly aroma she couldn't quite place.

“I love it here. I can't believe I've never been here before. Although, to be quite honest I've spent much of my time at the library lately.”

“What are you researching? I noticed a lot of your books were pretty old,” she observed, blushing. 

Loki searched her face before answering.

“Magic.”

Michelle’s expression didn’t give anything away, so he wondered if she’d heard him correctly. 

“Well, I’d love to hear more about that. Could we order and find a place to sit?” 

Loki nodded, grinning.

When they approached the counter, Michelle smiled up at him.

“Order anything you like. I have an  _ in _ with the manager here.” 

At first, Loki’s heart sank. All he could picture was her, cozying up to some suave young Midgardian wanker with swoop bangs and coffee breath. Then she took his hand, leading him into the darkest corner of the shop, and he dismissed the imaginary man immediately. 

“So, your friend doesn’t mind allowing me free coffee and pastries as well? I don’t want you to get yourself into trouble for me,” he winked, feeling her out. 

Michelle sighed, knowing she’d have to tell the truth sooner or later anyway.

“Actually, I didn’t want to tell you this before but-- I  _ own _ this place. I’m sorry I didn’t mention it earlier. It’s just that, most men are either very turned off by that or very intimidated. And I didn’t want to drive you away immediately.”

Loki’s eyes were wide as he gazed at her. 

“You  _ made _ this? This is all yours? That’s amazing!” He looked around once more as if he hadn’t already seen everything. 

“Did you decorate? Did you choose all of this?”

Michelle blushed and nodded.

“How could _anyone_ be turned off by that? Intimidated, yes. Turned off? Absolutely not. This place is a haven. I could _live_ here.” 

  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So, what makes you believe that Loki-  _ I _ \--” King corrected himself, “that I had a good reason for what I did?” 

His voice softened as he spoke. It was his turn to fear driving her away, and he certainly didn’t want that. They’d spent the last hour talking about her job and how she’d worked so hard to make the beautiful coffee shop a success. He felt as if he’d known her for a very long time. Perhaps even in another life. 

Michelle leaned closer so no one else could possibly hear. 

“Because you-  _ he _ \- he saved my life that day. He pulled me from what I know would have become my grave. All I remember is that there was a lot of debris, and I was buried. I don’t know why he chose to do that, but I never felt threatened by him- not even for a second.” 

She shook her head. 

“I just wish I could remember everything. All I remember is the way he looked at me. His eyes. And the way he-- the way he carried me to safety.” 

King Loki’s eyes glazed over slightly as he began to focus on what he could remember; the memories he’d inherited from Loki. 

“He… he couldn’t believe you trusted him. You were the one person who hadn’t looked at him like he was a monster.” 

Michelle gasped softly. 

“How do you know that? And how is it that you look  _ exactly _ like him?”

King took a deep breath, hoping this wouldn’t be the moment she decided she’d had enough. 

“I’m his clone. You see, he made seven of us in total. We consider ourselves brothers, but really, we’re all Loki. We have most of his memories, and many of the others also have his magic. That’s what I’ve been doing in the library; trying to prod my slow seidr into making an appearance.” 

“You’re...a clone? And no one knows about you all?” 

“No one besides ourselves and my brothers’ significant others. We typically don’t go out together, but if we did, we could simply cast an illusion so we all looked different,” he shrugged. 

Michelle looked thoughtful for a moment before laughing to herself.

“You know, I could use a few of you. Although, I’m not quite sure how I’d keep my customers from crawling all over the counter trying to get their hands on you.”

King grinned. 

“I’d  _ love _ to work here! I need a job anyway. Honestly, it’s difficult to find work as a-- well, someone like me. No identification. No driver’s license. And what are those other little cards everyone seems to require? Social…?”

“Social Security. Oh. Yeah. That must be difficult for you  _ and _ for him.”

“Well, he doesn’t really have to worry about money, and neither do we really. I’d just like to have something to do to keep the boredom at bay.” 

Michelle smiled. “I could hire you without any of those requirements…”

  
  
  


Not too long afterward, they were in the back storage room. Michelle was  _ supposed _ to be showing Loki around. He was to be her newest hire, after all. Instead, Loki had her wrapped in his arms, kissing her for all he was worth. 

“We should really get out of this room,” Michelle whispered breathlessly as he pressed soft kisses down her neck.

“Someone could come down here at any moment... And technically you aren't my employee yet but-- oh  _ god. _ ”

Loki was certain he had kissed this woman many times before. Her scent. The way her body melted into his. He couldn't explain the way he felt, but he knew he couldn't let her go. Little did he know, Michelle felt the same. 

“I never do this, but... Do you want to come up to my apartment? It's just up those stairs.”

Michelle blushed as she took Loki's hand, tugging him toward the door. She didn't want him to think she brought random men home all the time, but he didn't  _ feel _ random at all. He felt almost like a lost lover. 

It was those feelings that led them to make love all over her apartment that night and for the next few days. Both Loki and Michelle felt the connection, but neither of them understood it. They’d fallen in love with each other almost immediately, and they were both afraid. Afraid the other didn’t feel the same. Afraid of the intensity of their feelings. Afraid of actually  _ saying _ how they felt. 

Loki decided he couldn’t keep his feelings a secret any longer after just a few hours in Michelle’s presence. He  _ knew _ they had history. The idea that they had lost each other in some other time; some other realm made him desperate. 

He gently took Michelle’s shoulders, looking her in the eyes. Heart pounding wildly, he took a deep breath. 

“I know this is...insane. And I know it’s only been a few  _ hours _ since we met, but I-- Michelle-- I love you. I can’t understand this feeling. It’s as if we have known each other for hundreds of years. Or we were torn apart in some other realm. But I can’t stand the thought of losing you again. I apologize… if that frightens you.” 

Michelle could feel the intensity of his emotions, and it brought tears to her eyes. She had been feeling exactly the same way, but feared that actually voicing it would drive him away. 

“No. I mean, yes it’s really soon, but-- I love you too, Loki. I feel the same way. I don’t know how we fit together, but I feel it. Do you really think we  _ lost _ each other?” 

Her worried expression made Loki wrap his arms tightly around her, promising her that he wouldn’t dare allow that to happen again. 

“I know how we can find out. When is your next day off?” 

  
  
  
  


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“April, Loki, this is Michelle. I've been dying to introduce you. She owns that amazing coffee shop. You know the one?” King Loki explained excitedly.

“The one with all the beautiful artwork and lovely lighting? That’s yours?” April asked, stepping forward to give Michelle a quick hug. 

Loki stood stock still for a moment before speaking. 

“Nice to meet you, Meschella-- I mean…” 

Loki blinked, looking confused. 

“ _ Michelle.” _

But the name he'd said made Michelle take two steps back as her heart began to hammer in her chest. 

“Wh-what did you say? Before?”

Loki turned his head from one side to the other as if he was trying desperately to find the answer to a difficult riddle.

“Meschella,” he whispered.

“Excuse me for a moment,” he muttered, walking out of the room. 

April’s expression changed as she excused herself as well, following Loki to their bedroom. 

Michelle wondered if she was having an anxiety attack. Her heart was beating wildly, her hands were shaking, and she felt almost as if she was watching this scene unfold from another’s perspective. It was baffling and frightening, and when she turned to glance at King, she could see that he was just as confused as she was. 

“L-Loki?” Her lips trembled as she spoke. “What just happened?” 

For a moment, all he did was gaze at her with eyes so full of love she almost couldn’t breathe. 

“Meschella,” he breathed with wonder, “M-Michelle…” 

Just then, Loki came back from the bedroom appearing far more in control of himself. 

“Michelle, how is your family?”

Loki was looking at her as if he could see straight through her, and Michelle felt her knees start to buckle. Suddenly she realized that she didn't  _ know _ how her family was doing. She didn't even remember them. Yet... There was something in the far reaches of her mind…

But Loki continued without breaking his stride.

“How in the Nine did you get  _ here _ ? I recognized you… in New York. I remember saving you. But I couldn’t understand why I felt such a compulsion, especially when I knew--I can’t believe you’re  _ here _ .” 

The way he said  _ here _ as if she'd been somewhere  _ else _ made her dizzy. She held onto the nearby counter top for support as flashes of the past began to bombard her mind.

At first, Michelle didn’t want to acknowledge the feelings she was having. She didn’t  _ want _ to remember. It was just too much. But as soon as Loki had uttered that name-  _ Meschella _ \- her past came trickling back; Loki, the Frost Giants, the Rainbow Bridge, and Loki’s death. 

She suddenly remembered feeling guilt.  _ Horrible _ guilt and more anguish than she could ever possibly survive before... Death. 

_ Her _ death. 

Tears began to pour down Michelle’s face, and no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t stop them. She gazed between April’s Loki- who was watching her curiously- to  _ her _ Loki- who looked as though he was reading about his own past from a book page that was lying on the floor. His head was hanging, and his eyes were wide as they focused on a point just in front of his own feet. Michelle could feel his confusion. He was remembering the events at the same time that Loki remembered them. 

“I don’t remember how I got here. But I remember you d- falling,” Michelle choked. 

Even now, in a completely different realm and a lifetime away from Asgard, she still couldn't face what had happened. 

“Thor said… he said you fell. And I don’t remember anything else. Just… being here.” 

That was a lie, of course. Michelle remembered everything, but she couldn’t bring herself to tell Loki the truth; that she’d flung herself from the bridge that same night after she’d spoken with Thor. And somehow she’d managed to fall to Midgard? 

King Loki was overwhelmed. All at once, he was letting go of Gungnir, falling through the Abyss, being tortured by Thanos, missing his Meschella so badly he could hardly breathe, and standing in Loki’s living room experiencing the worst case of depersonalization he had ever felt.

Dear gods, was Michelle still in love with  _ Loki _ ? 

Meschella?

Michelle? 

Wait...he  _ was _ Loki. 

But was that good enough? Could he be enough after everything they had been through together? He knew exactly how much Loki loved her because he could feel it himself. He'd loved her before this revelation, but now- now it felt like the entire fabric of reality was held in place by one woman who happened to have two names. 

Meschella and Michelle. 

One was his past and one was his future, and he couldn't live without her.

Michelle turned to look at her Loki. She studied his face carefully, gently touching the slight lines around his mouth and eyes. 

“You’ve changed so much, my love. So much. Your eyes hold so much sorrow now. What happened to you while we were apart?” 

She continued to cry as he pulled her into his arms. 

“My darling, my sorrow is there  _ because _ we were apart,” he whispered softly. 

  
  
  


“I never meant to leave you,” Loki admitted, glancing awkwardly between April and Michelle. 

“I just knew I would not be a proper husband to you, especially after what I'd done.”

“I couldn't face you, knowing I'd have to tell you what I was. I never thought anyone could accept me-  _ love _ me- knowing that I was not Aesir,” he smiled softly at April, looking for some sign that this awkward conversation was not hurting her.

April took Loki's hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

“It's okay. You don't have to feel--” she paused, searching for the words, “strange about this, my love. I always knew you'd had others before me. And I'm glad you two will finally know what happened,” she smiled softly at King and Michelle.

“But... Thor said you let go. That you  _ wanted _ to fall,” Michelle countered, unable to say the word-  _ die _ . 

Loki frowned, looking at King, knowing he already knew the answer to her query.

“Michelle, you remember your Asgardian family, yes?”

He'd been tip-toeing around the real reason for his actions, and just as he remembered, she could feel it.

“I… yes, I do.” 

Michelle suddenly regretted asking. She didn't want to reveal the fact that she'd jumped from the bridge, and she knew she wouldn't be able to hide it much longer.

“The idea that I was one of those monsters who took your family away from you---  _ that's _ why I did what I did. Odin, Thor, they both believed I'd gone mad, but I thought I could prove my worthiness. Not to them. To  _ you _ .”

“When I failed, I thought I  _ wasn't _ enough. Not for you, not for Odin, not for Thor…”

Michelle took King Loki's hand, looking into his eyes. She could feel his uncertainty, and it broke her heart.

“Loki,” she smiled softly, “ _ you _ are my love.  _ You're _ my Loki. All of this... History... May have happened between different versions of you and me, but it will always be  _ you and me _ .” 

April smiled, nodding at King Loki. 

“You know, when you came out of that lab, you thought it was your mission to take over the planet,” she giggled. 

“You had charts, maps, projections... You even took his helmet out of the top of our closet! That's why we all called you  _ King _ .” 

Her voice softened. 

“But that's also why I believe you were made for her,” she smiled at Michelle.

“It seems that many things in Loki's life have ended in tragedy, but this has not. This is a new beginning.”

She turned to her Loki, who was grinning in approval. 

“I agree. At first, when April said each clone had part of my past; pieces of my  _ being _ , I scoffed because it all seemed so unlikely. But I can clearly see that  _ you _ are the Loki who saved Michelle in New York. You may have been a part of me at the time, but it was  _ you _ all along.”

The admission wasn't easy for Loki, but he knew that his brother needed reassurance. He could still remember how it felt to love Meschella, but his heart belonged to April.

“Are you two finally going to get married? I proposed quite some time ago,” Loki said, only half joking.

King Loki glanced at Michelle, who was still wiping tears from her eyes. 

“I would marry you right now. In this very spot.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Verdandi gasped and turned to the other two Norns.

“One of  _ you _ meddled with this far more than I did!”

Skuld glanced between Verdandi and Urd before speaking.

“I thought if she landed in the  _ right _ place at the  _ right _ time, then perhaps our young prince would change his mind about the dangerous path he was on.”

Verdandi was outraged. 

“And you thought dropping her in the middle of New York City  _ while he tried to take over the planet _ was the  _ right time _ ?!”

She shrugged.

“I wasn't  _ completely _ wrong. He did waver. And she was able to have her own life for a while.”

“But-- how did she not realize she didn't have a past? A family?” Verdandi asked, confused.

Urd cleared her throat, looking slightly guilty.

“Midgardians tend to have short memories. They live in the present. It's in their nature,” she grinned, “but now she is back where she belongs.”

  
  
  
  



End file.
